New York/LA can suck an egg

Ah, well. It doesn't look like I'll have a review for you this weekend, since only our privileged coastal brethren get the opening of The Darjeeling Limited and Lust Caution, respectively. For anyone in town who wants to know, Milwaukee gets Lust on October 12th, and Darjeeling on October 19th. So I'll probably post reviews that are way later than the mass of internet reviews out there much later, but if you read them it'll make me feel a lot better.

Anyway, I couldn't help but glance at the reviews for The Darjeeling Limited to see where the magic number on Rotten Tomatoes would fall this time- the verdict so far: 68%, but the "cream of the crop," which is to say the more respectable, accredited members of the critical population have it at 50%.

Whatever. Wes Anderson makes the same movie every time, and that's fine with me- for reference, see this Onion Article: "New Wes Anderson Film Features Deadpan Delivery, Meticulous Art Direction, Characters With Father Issues."

It's like escargot: some people like it, others don't. If you try it once and don't like it, good for you. If you try it five times and still don't like it, why are you still talking to me? I know it's a critic's job to honestly assess each film, and that a director's previous films should enter the equation somewhat, but honestly: Snakes on a Plane gets a free pass at 69% but The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou is mixed at 52%? I think even Wes Anderson at this point is only aiming for Wes Anderson fans.

That's why I'm here for you- I probably won't pay money to see something I'm not going to like, so I won't waste your time telling you had bad the new Farrelly Brothers movie is. And if you don't want to know how awesome The Darjeeling Limited was (in three weeks), it's not on you to read about it, either.